Today, this track is one of the most famous Father’s Day songs. Sadly, on July 1, 2005, about 2 years after the release of the song, Vandross died tragically at the age of 54. The song peaked at number 38 on the US Billboard Hot 100 and number 21 on the UK Singles Chart. Vandross once referred to the song as his “career song”. Shortly after the song was released, Vandross’ mother, Mary Ida Vandross said she was amazed how despite being only just 7 years old, Vandross was still able to remember vividly the happy home they used to have.
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And this was because it touched on a subject (the death of his father) that he (Vandross) had never written about.
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As a result of his illness, Vandross was unable to promote the single however, it went on to become one of the most successful songs of his career.Īccording to the song’s co-writer Richard Marx, writing the song was very emotional for Vandross. Also, it is worth noting that the album went on to become the most successful album released by Vandross throughout his career.Ībout two weeks after the song was released, Vandross suffered a major stroke that left him in a coma for close to two months. This final album of his was his only studio project to make it to the top of the U.S. The song was released on 30th May, 2003 as a single from Vandross’ thirteenth and last studio album of the same name. “Dance with My Father” was produced by Vandross and American music arranger and composer Nat Adderley Jr. The song was written by Luther Vandross and American rock singer Richard Marx, whom prior to that had worked with Vandross on a number of occasions. Follow him on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. Gerren Keith Gaynor is the Homepage and Opinion Editor at theGrio. A society in which being gay doesn’t feel like a prison sentence or something to hide. While Luther may have lived in the closet, let us honor his legacy by cultivating a better society than the one he knew. Having expectations that prevented him from being out, and proud of the talented and loving man that he was. But it also doesn’t matter much considering the real crime is that Vandross lived his 54 years of life living for others. Should Patti LaBelle have made the decision to confirm Vandross’ sexuality? Maybe not. What we do know is that what kept him in the dark is an industry, and a society, marred by bigotry. Unfortunately we will never know whether or not Luther would have felt empowered enough to come out, as his former J Records boss, Clive Davis, did in 2013.
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That alone tells us we still have a long way to go. Today, Frank Ocean remains the only openly gay Black man in mainstream R&B. Though, in 2017, we are fortunate to see better LGBTQ depictions in media, there’s still little representation in music, especially in the R&B arena. It’s not clear if Vandross ever did find that fairytale love by the time he passed, but even if he did, it’s a shame that he struggled to simply be who he was out front and center. How ironic that a man made famous for singing love songs on world stages, providing a soundtrack of love for generations, never truly knew love for himself. “I want somebody–who’s not on payroll–to care about where I am.” “It was very painful, unrequited, and alienating–very alienating.” “The response was, ‘Thank you, but I’m not interested,’” he recalled. His first experience of unrequited love occurred when he was just 16. “The time that I’ve spent being in love has never been reciprocated. In the same Vibe interview, Vandross admitted that he had never been in love. Like any Black gay man, closeted or not, Vandross only desired what anyone wanted out of life: love and happiness. Who would’ve wanted to come out in such a nasty climate? Nothing about being out at that time seemed safe or worthwhile. What’s worse, years later, in 2000, there was an erroneous report that he had died from the disease.
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Not being candid about his sexuality brought an onslaught of rumors that he had contracted AIDS. “I know that I’m paying a price for being so private…and I do wonder if it’s worth it,” he added. “Am I bicoastal? Yeah, I have houses in Beverly Hills and New York.” In a 2001 interview with Vibe, Vandross jokingly responded to the years-long chatter about his sexuality. In fact, it doesn’t appear Vandross ever really cared that people thought he was gay–he was simply unwilling to confirm or deny it. The tragedy is that he had to hide it in the first place. The tragedy is not that LaBelle outed Vandross without his blessing.